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Monday, September 17, 2012

PMS?

I don't feel good tonight. I feel so alone, I feel so down, feel so sad, dunno how to explain. I feel so weak, feel like crying. Now, if I feel like crying, I have to cry all alone, no one is there to listen to my sadness, back to those time when I didn't have anybody, not that I 'really' don't have anybody, it's just that, if before this, I used to share my sadness, nowadays, it seems that I couldn't share the tears anymore, he can never see, he never knows, but still he can console me, but not by speaking to me, but yet, by typing to me. It's not the same:(.

To bother my friends, not a good idea I think, they are all busy studying, and end up, I'm in my room, wiping my tears alone. Even now, if I try to study, I can't really focus, feel so stupid, I don't know anything :( .

Then, I keep thinking about my future, my life and everything. Now, I may plan a lot of things, I may dream to have a lot of things, to gain a lot of things, but truth is, only HE will decide what will be my fate. What the only thing I can do is by PRAYING hard, hoping that my dreams and plans come true. And if, the plans don't go the way it should, I really hope I can face it with open heart.

 It's hard, really hard. Please give me your shoulder, so that I can cry without worries in my mind anymore. :(
Good night and Assalamulaikum.

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