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Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Letter to you, love.

I feel so weak, so so weak. I feel gloom, tired, bad and unfortunate. This morning I was just okay, thinking that you were okay, but you weren't. The tears keep raining now and then, trying to hold but failure overtakes me. Sometimes, I feel like my pulse is not there, hiding out somewhere even I can't find. I don't blame you, not at all. I love you, that's for sure, no doubt at all. I love you so so much. I am sorry if I hurt you with my words, I didn't mean like that, my first intention just to share with you my feelings, that's it. I didn't want to keep even a single thing in my heart and mind without you knowing because I am so deeply in love with you.

I know, you may need sometimes your own, some precious time alone, I can't stop that. But, it just hurt me, thinking that you are not okay somewhere, and the reasons are because of me. :( Truly from my heart I am sorry. Take your time as long as you can, go and find your peace, because my little me sometimes gives you nothing but sadness and guilty you felt, although it is not at all your fault, I tell you. Please be happy and cheer up again, the way that I used to know you. Your friends, they maybe the place where you may find some peace and calmness, surely not me at this time. Don't you worry about me, I am okay, these tears which run along my cheek throughout this writing will soon get evaporated and lost, let me weep my tears with my leftover of spirit I got.

Get back to me, when you feel like to, when you head is already cleared from sadness I made. I just want you to know, I don't mind saying it thousands or trillion times, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, and will always love you for the rest of my life, till I totally lose my pulse which may be hiding forever. Ya Allah, please take care of him, avoid him from any pain, release him from any sadness, and fullfill his life with joy and laughter and of course, Your bless. Take care, my dear, be happy and smile, that's the precious thing about you that I love.

Till then, goodbye and assalamualaikum. =)

P/s: Actually, I have to study for the test, but I don't feel like to, I just can't think right now, I am too weak. I just hope the remaining evening that is left will be better than half the day that have passed. :)

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